OK. So, global warming didn’t really ruin my trip, but it definitely whooped my ass pretty good and hard.
Hiding from the sun at Roche Abbey.
I got back from my five-week-long trip last Friday and my brain is just now starting to function again. I felt pretty discombobulated and spacey for several days after being awake for 24+ hours as I crossed four time zones on my long trip home.
I completely blanked on my dentist appointment the other day that I had rescheduled twice (currently looking for a new dentist, because I can’t show my face there now) and I’ve woken up every morning at 3 AM ready to rock and roll. Jet lag is real.
Or, maybe I had heat stroke and it’s still affecting my brain?
Yes, heat stroke.
You might not be aware, but the U.K. (and Ireland and probably most of Europe) is having a heat wave of epic proportions right now. We touched down right in the middle of this insanity.
I was not fully prepared.
I packed layers. I packed sweaters. A knit hat. Scarves. Long sleeves. A fucking coat.
We had a few glorious days in Scotland where a sweater and a coat was necessary. After that, Mother Nature said a big “Eff you” to my plans of having a lovely, cool, “typical” British summer.
The kind of summer where I get to wear layers to cover my never-ready-for-summer-body is precisely the kind of summer I want to have. (Edinburgh Castle)
There were a couple of days on the Isle of Skye when it was so chilly, I couldn’t get warm and it was everything I hoped it’d be.
(The Skye Museum of Island Life)
Crazily, it never reached higher than 85 degrees, but it felt like it was way hotter. Way.
WANT TO KNOW WHY?
1. It was pretty humid and humidity makes things that much more awesome.
Where I live, it’s not uncommon for temperatures to reach triple digits in the summer. It blows. I hate the heat. I hate the heat even more than I hate low carb diets. It’s that serious. However, if I had to choose my heat, I’d choose dry heat a million times over humidity. 77 and humid feels like dying a slow death on the surface of the sun.
2. There was no AC in most places. I repeat: NO AIR CONDITIONING (this included no trace of a fan anywhere).
When the weather normally only gets uncomfortable for a couple times a year, it’s not smart to invest in an air conditioning system. I get it. I was prepared for the no AC thing, because it wasn’t my first time in the U.K. I could have handled the odd couple of days of uncomfortable heat, but it was hot LIKE EVERYDAY.
It wouldn’t have been too horrible, but the places we lived in for up to a week had nothing to move the hot air around with. When you only have three pairs of pants that you plan on wearing more than once, it kind of sucks that you have swamp ass from sun up to sun down.
3. HEAVY DUVETS EVERYWHERE
So, it was hot. It wasn’t the end of the world. We were on a dream trip and we enjoyed every sweaty moment of it. I soon got used to feeling damp on every inch of my body, but what I never got used to was the lack of a certain essential element of American bedding- the top sheet (also referred to as a flat sheet).
Had it not been hot and muggy most nights, a heavy duvet wouldn’t have been a problem at all. However, when you’re a freak about your bedding and you have to be covered with something, the lack of a thin, cool flat sheet was really fucking terrible.
I’m sorry to every owner of every bed we slept in. The smell will probably never come out.
The one night my mom and I thought we were smart and took the cover off the duvets and just slept with the covers, it got really cold. Of-fucking-course.
So, that’s how global warming ruined my ideal British summer. Is there somewhere I can send my complaint to?
I am so excited to be back (well, actually, I’m really missing proper scones with clotted cream and jam, British pints, Mr. Kipling Bakewell Tarts, M&S Percy gum, and English mustard and ham crisps, but I’m dealing) and I’m ready to share all about our trip of a lifetime.
Check back each week for another travel satire post!
This is a satirical post, but global warming is real and it’s happening, ya’ll. When we were in Dublin, the server at a pub we went to said Ireland was on a 40-day no rain streak and he had never seen so many days without rain. This broke my heart, because what makes Ireland beautiful is the presence of rain-lots of it.
I know I’ll get some comments about global warming. I’m really not up for a debate on something that has tons of scientific evidence backing it up. If you do want to leave me a comment, please let me know what you think about this warm (hot) weather in Britain and elsewhere (if it applies). Or, tell me about a time you had some surprise weather on a trip.
Guess what…. It’s bucking it down! Hahahaha told you, you should of come back. It has been very hot, to the point that the council has out a ban on using the hose or washing your car, so most gardens around this area are brown… not a pretty sight. But we have a mega storm because of the heat, and right now it’s pouring it down haha. Global warming is a big thing, but also the movement of the earth. Each year we see that the equator is moving, making cold places warmer and warmer places hot ( add that to global warming and the world is in chaos right now). Loved your post xx
I really, really hope you guys get crazy rain. I don’t want my favorite place in the world to die!!! 😫😫😫😫
Guess what! We had rain all last night and temperatures are down to 18C ( from 35C). It’s supposed to go up to 25C but with more rain on its way. 😉
You favorite place in the world might have a chance
Oh phew!!
I am melting… Can’t even figure out why the invented clothes at the moment! The humidity is ridiculous!!!! Gotta drive 3 hours with squabbling kids and broken AC today… Joy!
OMG. Broken AC in the car?! Just throw away the car. It’s no good to you now 😂😫😫😫😫😱😱 Seriously though, stay cool. I worry about the older people who can’t handle the heat as well 😢
It’s so hard.. and took me 5 hours!!!
Oh my goodness! How long should that have taken?!
3 hours… I know that’s long enough… But add extra, in the heat, with two kids who’d rather be anywhere but stuck in a car… Hell!!!
That literally sounds very much like what I imagine Hell would be like!
Totally!!!
I have a memory of mentioning the hear wave to you in a feed but feeling like it couldn’t last… now I am sweating in a bucket. Still. And it is raining. Hot rain.
I thought it wouldn’t last either… It’s so muggy at the moment, bleh!
Very bleh😣
Hot rain?! That sounds like a humidity horror waiting to happen! You totally mentioned it and I figured it wouldn’t last either 😫😫😫
It is a bit freakish. Humidity has taken us over. You got out in time!!
It sounds like it!! 😱😱
I am so glad to have woken up to a new blog post from you! WOO HOO!! And on a day where I have an extra hour in the morning and I could actually read it.
When I went to the UK I had the opposite expectation. I went the end of August and packed all the shorts and light layers possible thinking it was going to be HAWT and then froze half the time lol But really? No flat sheet? I love my flat sheet!
I was SO sad that I loaded my suitcase with clothes for cold weather! I remember you telling me that and it made me pretty excited for what I hoped was that same weather. NOPE.
Yeah, flat sheets are totally not a thing there 😳
Well dang!! It did look like you were having a great time even if the weather was hot and humid!
I don’t know how people can deal without a flat sheet! Its totally crazy to me
We did. We had an AWESOME time! I know, right?!
It got even hotter since you left, can you imagine?!
By the way, it was so nice meting! I really look forward to reading your posts!
I can’t even imagine. Have you guys had to get an AC unit?! It was SO nice meeting!! 😘😘
No, no AC unit for us! To be fair, I don’t find it that bad… I’m used to it I guess. The husband suffers a little more!
Oh man. You’re a tough one! I become really cranky at even just the mention of hot temps 😂
Several years ago a friend in Britain told me they were having a heat wave, that it was getting up to 80 degrees F–in this case the ‘F’ stands for “too F’ing hot”–which at the time was unusual. It’s disturbing that these heat waves are coming more frequently and getting more intense.
I’m glad, though, that you did still enjoy your trip and “swamp ass” is making me laugh even if climate change is no laughing matter.
It really is disturbing. I mean, it wasn’t as green as I remember it. The beautiful green that makes that country so stunning is literally dying a slow death. Hahaha. Swamp ass, like global warming, is real 😂😫
Douwe Egberts? A guy could get hurt trying to pronounce that.
BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA! Right?! I can’t even begin to imagine how the first word is pronounced. Whoever he is, he did a mean £1 hot chocolate 😂😜😜
Global warming is REAL. I got your back, buddy.
Thank you, buddy! 😘
I am sorry that you didn’t get the cool summer you were hoping for BUT it was a pretty good excuse to try the various flavours of British (and Irish) ice-cream!! 😀
I think the closest thing I had to this was forgetting to back my coat on a trip to France. I had to buy an emergency coat at the airport (as it was December!) It worked out well as I do still love that coat! 😉
p.s. Anyone that does not believe in global warming, and the human influence on it, is loopy. Sorry…I mean they are ignoring the majority of scientists in favour of some crooks in Fox News. 🙁
Yes! I tried ALL the ice cream literally EVERYWHERE, but I did that rain or shine 😂😂.
I remember hearing about that coat. That’s too funny. It’s a good thing it’s still proving useful to you!
I don’t get how anyone can still disagree with global warming. Even aside from the fact that the evidence is mounting, I can feel it and see it with my own eyes! Our weather is literally changing before us!
Yep. Cold crazy winters, ridiculously dry summers and all the ‘global weirding’ events.
…And that’s before you even get into the plastic clogging up the oceans. 🙁
It’s really scary, friend. Sad too. Really, really sad what we’ve done to our planet…😢
I grew up in an extremely humid area and have since moved to the mountains. Mountains make everything better (unless it’s a volcano. Fuck volcanoes!). There are no memories that really stick out to me that are weather related in previous trips, but we’re close enough to our wedding (!) and honeymoon (!!) that the extended forecasts are calling for thunderstorms… damn it. But it’s still fairly early I suppose. Can’t wait to read all about your trip!
I LOVE the mountains! I’m a lake mountain girl, as that’s where I spent every summer of my childhood.
One of the best weddings I ever attended was one that included dark clouds, thunder and lightening, and a tiny smattering of rain. It might really add to your wedding! Besides, I’ve heard rain on a wedding day is good luck ❤️
Today it is currently 98 degrees F here in Western Germany, also a land without A/C. I am currently melting. We spent the first half of the day at the lake and now this once very pale blue-eyed girl is bright red. Also, what do Germans have against ice cubes? No A/C, no fucking ice cubes. I am laying next to the dog, in my underwear and bra with the one fan we own blowing on us. I may drown in a puddle of my own sweat.
That was another thing we rarely saw- ice cubes! I don’t get that one at all. I don’t know how you’re doing it. I practically run from mi air conditioned car into my air conditioned house, because the heat is too unbearable. Do you at least have a fan??
We do have a fan. It has been a hell of an adjustment living here in the summertime. I was very addicted to my comfortable A/C back in the States. We bought an ice cube tray so we have cubes. We are also the weird Americans that drink tap water. Melting freaks of nature that drink tap water and love ice cubes.
What do they drink if they don’t drink tap water?! That’s the only water we drank on our trip as we brought water bottles! I hope the heat wave breaks for you guys!
Here in Germany most people drink carbonated water. They look at you like you have asked for toilet water when you ask for water from the tap. Lol
That’s so expensive to just drink bottled water! THAT’S crazy!
I agree!! Thankfully they have a very good recycling program here. You can return your bottles for .25 each.
Oh good!!
Humidity aside, I’m glad that your trip went well! We had similar humidity here off-and-on for about three weeks, so I feel your pain. And I love that photo of you on the castle steps – you look fantastic!
Thank you so much!! Humidity is truly the devil’s work, man. I’m so glad I live in a desert 😂😜
Climate change is serious business! Hotter temperatures in the UK can actually be very dangerous, because the people there aren’t used to them. HEAT STROKE IS REAL, YA’LL, and it can be fatal.
That said, I’m glad you enjoyed your trip, even if it was ridiculously hot. When you mentioned the duvets, the first thing I thought was, “Just take the covers off and use those,” and then I read what happened when you did. XD That’s awful.
That’s what I had on my mind the whole time- how are the older people, who can’t handle the heat, faring?! It’s really a serious thing when a country that isn’t used to and is not equipped for high, prolonged heat experiences heat waves like what is still occurring. It’s got me worried for so many reasons 😢
Yup. The cover thing only worked for a couple of hours 😂😫😫
I remember a couple years ago they had a heat wave where temperatures got into the 90s (F) and people were like, “Psh! It’s 111* where I’m at! They’re so whiny!” And I’m just sitting there like YOU HAVE ADAPTED TO THOSE HOTTER TEMPERATURES! SCIENCE! BIOLOGYYYYYYYY!!!!!! Bah. Hopefully, people are able to stay cool.
I wonder when people are gonna get it??
Also, I’m not sure why, but this post isn’t showing up in my Bloglovin’ feed. Hmm….
Uh oh!! Does it normally show up in Bloglovin’??
Yea. It did show up eventually. BL’s feed can take a hot minute for some blogs, but usually the issue is with self-hosted blogs and I’m pretty sure you’re hosted on WordPress. It was just weird.
I had no idea it even posted there!!
Bloglovin is just a reader, like any RSS feed. It tracks more sites than the WO reader (which struggles with non WP sites) so I prefer it for keeping track of everything I read instead of going to a dozen different readers or individual sites.
Nice!! Maybe I should pay more attention to it 😜
Same for my trip to Sweden and Norway… I was sweating way more than I had prepared for – so much hotter than I had ever recalled Sweden being. And with all the news of “extreme heat wave” I realized it wasn’t just me or lack of memory lol…then… Forest fires hit Sweden while we were there! Ugh! Luckily the last two days were a much more bearable temp in general so at least we finished off relatively comfortable.
There were fires in northern England and in Ireland! It was so sad that not only was it way too hot, the country was burning up. We had much cooler temps in Ireland, too, which was the last part of our trip. It was raining buckets in Dublin the day we left and I was so happy they broke their 40 day no rain steak.
That missing top sheet crap – it’s for real. I am not a fan…
Seriously!!! It’s not the complete package without them!
I started calling it “Climate Change” to help shut-up the people who say “global warming, yeah right” every time there’s a colder-than-usual winter. The nature of tropical storms is changing. The track of the Gulf Stream is less predictable, and plants grow in different regions than previously. Winters being colder doesn’t mean the climate isn’t changing! Soon a wine-tour through Europe will be wildly different from what it currently is.
That’s a good way to shut those people up! It’s really quite scary as we are watching it literally unfold and there are still people who deny the existence of any sort of problem…
I lived on the east coast for years, and it is very real there, as states take measures and pass laws directly related to rising seas. Then I moved to the midwest, where there isn’t an obvious, conscious, visual danger, and people find it easier to turn a blind eye. Drove me crazy.
It’s pretty easy to turn a blind eye when it doesn’t directly affect you. Pretty sad.
Welcome to England, where we’re unprepared for EVERYTHING! At the opposite end, when it snows everything grinds to a halt! Glad you had a good time despite the weather 😀
LOL! I’m glad I packed a few tank tops! I was, for the most part, pretty prepared! I was just disappointed as I was looking for a reprieve from the heat. It was 102 yesterday 😫😫😫
Were there stores to buy cooler clothing? It’s hot and humid here in Vegas. I love heat but not humidity nor the way it affects my Migraines.
It’s humid in Vegas?! That’s cray. It’s hot here in Reno, but not humid at all 🙌🏻.
I actually had some tank tops and cooler clothing, so I was at least prepared in that sense.
Oh good. I’ve never been to Reno. Should go, some time.
You should! You could take a trip to Tahoe or Virginia City ❤️❤️
Doesn’t it figure that you pack so much crap and it’s an epic heat wave? I cannot believe you were there for 5 weeks! You lucky dog!! I’m glad your safely back in the states! Welcome home!
Haha! It was such crap! Thanks. I’m 90% glad to be home 😜
Well 90% is a lot!
I’m so sorry the stupid heatwave happened for the ENTIRE time you were. The timing stunk. It’s rained here for the last 3 days & my garden (and me) are so thankful for it. I never thought I’d ever be happy to see rain. Now, in many ways I’ve enjoyed the heatwave as whilst we do get this weather over the summer it only usually lasts a few days then it’s rain or overcast weather then it’s hot again for a few days and so on and so forth. So it’s been nice for the weather to stay fine & be able to plan ahead. Usually in the summer in the U.K., you always have to have a Plan A and a Plan B depending on the weather. It’s very annoying. Having said all that, the news said that our summers might be like this every year now. Great in some ways, very worrying in other ways. It’s clearly the effects of global warming & this scares me. Everyone’s lawns are currently yellow in the U.K. and this never happens on a nationwide scale 😟
That’s what I’m SO SCARED OF! That’s the new normal?!! 😢
I know, It’s not good. It’s not England ☹️
That’s what is the saddest part. In my neck of the woods, it’s not uncommon to go a month without rain so it’s not as obvious here that there is a problem. No rain in England is a BIG deal 😢
My friend who lives in London said when it finally did rain, it was the first time she saw Brits actually run outside in the rain. Pretty insane summer they’re having!
Oh wow!! I’m sure they’re grateful for what little rain they’re getting! It was crazy how dry it was!
I was in Taiwan about 6 months ago and our first night in the hotel, I crawled into bed and quickly fell asleep. A few minutes later, my wife nudged me. Stop shaking your foot (I do that sometimes), you’re shaking the whole bed. I opened my eyes and lay there a second. “No. I think we’re having an earthquake.”
It was pretty big. The next morning, we had tons of inquiries from our friends back home. “We heard the island your on had an earthquake last night. Are you OK?” Apparently, a few hotels have collapsed and people died. BUT WE WERE GOOD.
For the next few days, we were touring around the island and the fog was so thick we only had about a 50-foot visibility. We were taken to ancient temples and pagodas that we couldn’t take pictures of. We stayed in hotels that overlooked canyons covered in lush rainforest (at least that’s what they told us). The postcards of the places looked amazing.
OMG!! How scary! My boyfriend does that too!! 😂😫😫
Ugh!! That is just the worst. You should be able to get your money back when the weather doesn’t cooperate 👎🏻
The heat is finally backing off! I’m sorry that you ended up having such an unexpected summer of heat here, I feel the same way as I hate the heat too! There are forecasts for thunderstorms at the weekend which I’m sure my lawn will be extremely grateful for! I’m pleased you had a gorgeous time nonetheless and got home safely!! Enjoy the rest of summer!!
I’m so glad you guys are going to be getting some rain!!