So, like, you know how heavy whipping cream is like a staple of the keto diet? Sure, lots of greens and grass fed meats are pretty key, but
HEAVY WHIPPING CREAM
Have you ever just had a spoonful of heavy whipping cream (of course the fuck not because the majority of you- the odd three or so followers I have left- aren’t psychos)?
Heavy whipping cream is legit heavy. It sticks to the roof of your mouth and blankets your tongue in a thick coat of fat. It somehow makes it into your brain’s pleasure receptors, where it does the version of the Macarena where you just flail your arms around and laugh like a hyena because you have no idea what you’re doing, but YAY, HEAVY FUCKING WHIPPING CREAM.
Once you try a spoonful, it only makes sense to use it in place of your 1% Lactaid when you make yourself an entire box of Pasta Roni. And by you, I mean me.
Oh, I’m sorry.
Did you think I was doing keto, finally?
Excuse me while I laugh in fat and desperate, but still ain’t trying keto.
So, once I learned how absolutely mind-blowing heavy cream is in boxed pasta (like, no joke, better than any of the pasta I ate in Italy), I knew I had to try it in my Chocolate Peanut Butter Cheerios.
Heavy whipping cream in cereal should be outlawed, in case you were wondering. It’s just not fair to regular milk.
These are just some of the delights I ate tonight, along with two mini bags of popcorn, a pudding cup topped off with a giant dollop of marshmallow cream, and some canned corn because I’m not a savage.
What makes this all the more oh-no-baby-what-is-you-doin was that just this past Monday, the day we returned from winter break, I chose to wear jeans to work.
Jeans.
Jeans, after two solid weeks of sweatpants and fists full of homemade Chex Muddy Buddies.
I figured… what did I figure? Was I even figuring?
If you must know, I still have an indent in my stomach from the waistband, and I couldn’t sit at a 90 degree angle the entire day. In case you weren’t aware, most sitting is done at a 90 degree angle.
So, what’s new with me? As you can see, not a damn thing.
What’s new with you two?
(I’m speaking to the two stragglers I have left here).
Have you ever tried heavy whipping cream in your cereal? Did it blow your pants off (just literally, unfortunately) like it did me?
I’d forgotten all about this until your post, but one year I discovered that you can greatly improve the flavor of stale homemade biscuits by drizzling them with heavy cream and sprinkling them with sugar. I’ve since discovered that both dairy and wheat do evil things to my digestive system, but I still dream about those damn biscuits.
Oooh! My mom recently said that heavy cream makes literally everything better. My digestive system does not love dairy one bit, but I’m apparently a glutton for punishment.
Haha! I have not tried whipping cream in cereal. But, I do prefer real whipped cream with sugar and the good Mexican vanilla on most anything sweet! Shockingly, my work pants fit me when I put them on on Monday. Not sure how, but I managed to maintain and not gain. Wish I could figure out how to lose without hating life… 🤷🏼♀️
Mexican vanilla is the only vanilla- it’s the best!! I wish I knew the secret too!
From my most recent trip, I brought back 6 liter bottles, 8 250ml bottles, and 4 100ml bottles… I might have a bit of an addiction to Mexican vanilla! I even added a splash of it into my smoothie this morning! 😉
Ooh!! It truly is the best!
I just reread and noticed the quantities of bottles you bought 🤣🤣🤣
I paid the $75 heavy baggage fee… it was worth it! 😉
For all that vanilla?? Heck yeah!!
You’re alive! 😀 Haven’t tried whipped cream on anything, so I may have to take a chance. And I thought Madagascar vanilla was supposed to be the most flavorful . . . ?
I am! Haha! I’m not 100% sure about Madagascar vanilla because I’ve never had it. Is it really yummy?
I haven’t tried it either. Just have a good friend who seems to swear by it. I should investigate.
Def haha! Anything for good vanilla.
So happy to read your posts again, you were missed.
The only time I’ve tried heavy whipping cream is to make whipped cream. I do use half and half in my morning coffee, does that count?
Thank you!! I appreciate hearing that ☺️. Half and half is close but no cigar 😜
😂😂omg this is exactly what I needed today!! I ate tons of crap over Christmas but thankfully my pants all still fit lol which is a SHOCK because the dryer has been shrinking my dress pants like a crazy horrible monster!
That’s it! I’ll blame the dryer 😉😆
Of course!!
Hahahaha oh sugar! Lol you crack me up!
Kaaaatie, you’re back! 😀 Happy New Year lovely!!
OMG, so Marc is being keto at the moment, so that means I’m keto in the evening so I don’t have to cook two meals. It involves plenty of cream, cream cheese, avocado oils, cheeeeeese (as well as mountains of vegetables.) I am actually quite enjoying the food (as i still eat carbs/sugar in the day time.) As a supportive wife, I will get fatter from his diet! Oops…
I meant to ask you, even if you’re not keto, you could try baking with monk fruit sugar (instead of real sugar) so far each time I have tried it, the taste is really similar, but you can’t metabolize the calories from that sugar. It might help you get your sweet-fix, without jumping off the diet-wagon.
The only thing that is really strange with monk fruit sugar is meringue. Cakes and cookies work fine. 😉
I have looked into monk fruit as a sweetener but as is with most healthier options, it’s make expensive. When I get serious with eating better, it’s something I’ll def try!!
The cream and cheese associated with the keto diet is bomb! But, I’m doing like you- eating “keto” with my heavy cream while still carb loading 🤣🤣
Yeah it can be really pricey compared to sugar. 🙁
We found it was way less on amazon than in the shops (in case that helps…)
I’ll for sure check it out there!!
Coffee
Whiskey
Heavy whipped cream
Food, or in this case drink, of the Gods
Oh yessssssss, girl!
So glad you are back! I would comment on your post further but I am on my way to the grocery store to buy some heavy cream…
I just can’t with the heavy whipping cream. Pup does keto and he thinks it’s just the best, but it makes me want to gag. I don’t like anything that coats my mouth in fat. I don’t like anything that coats my mouth in anything at all, really. Coating is for M&Ms, not my food hole, thankyouverymuch.
LOL!!! I truly can see how the coating and filling of every little nook and cranny could be gross. Too bad it makes everything taste like heaven!
I really am doing the LCHF and sometimes Keto thing. I put Heavy Cream in EVERYTHING! I do miss having a coffee with sugar, heavy cream, and amaretto…but I still use the heavy cream. I LOVE it!
How is it going?? I really do want to try it but I’m addicted to carbs!! HELP!
I’ve lost 20lbs and brought my HgA1c down to 6 from 7.5. Working on my next 20lbs to get back to my premarriage weight!
Daaaaaaang! You go, girl!
We are going to Greece in August for my 50th Birthday. I really want to be back to my normal, healthy weight.
Soooooo exciting! You got this!!
Totally onboard for anything and everything made more magnificent with heavy whipping cream. Sooooo glad you’re back here! Don’t go away again!
Yay! You’re on the heavy whipping cream bus! I’ll try not to keep leaving!